The whimpers today are mine...

Today I cry, the stress is too much. I will start at the begining. I had a paper that I worked really hard to do a good job on. I read and reread the stories and basically he asked for a comparative essay on the two items. At first one of the stories made little sense but after reading and rereading I interpreted it a bit differently. The night I sat down to write, my ex was supposed to pick the kids up at 6pm. I called to ask if he might come just a little early even. He didn't reply and after I called repeatedly he finally answered around 5:10 and told me he was on his way but had ran to where he was staying first. This is the thing, he works about 30 minutes from town on the northside. I live about 20 minutes from town on the southside. He's staying currently about 40 minutes on the west side of town. The only reason he went home first was to pick up the whore. Instead of letting her wait a couple of hours for him to get his kids and get home, he must make his kids wait while he goes to get her. It's okay that I have things to do, as long as he isn't inconvenienced. He got here finally at 8pm. It took me 30 minutes to calm down enough to write. My kids were upset from waiting on him. Although they seem to be getting used to it. Why must he be so unreliable? It's to the point that the only thing you can expect from him is to disappoint his children. Not only that but he was to bring my daughter to her game on Saturday. I told him to be there at 3pm because she was to have her pictures taken first. He did not show up until 3:50. She missed her pictures. They were retakes because lots of the ones last time ended up messed up because of a memory card issue. The photographer told me he would check to see if her last ones turned out okay. If so, he is going to go with those. If not, she will need retakes. Also he didn't even watch my daughter's halftime performance. He was too busy going to the snackbar for whatever he wanted. My son came to ask if we would get him something to eat because all his father had given him that day was a bowl of cereal. This was 4pm in the afternoon and when he asked his father to get him some food there he was offered two french fries from a container that he and his whore were sharing. It just figures. My friend that attended the game took him over and got him some nachos, not exactly wholesome food but it works. Okay so the point of me going into all of this is that I got my grade back from this paper, the paper that I worked and worked on. I hoped to get a decent grade. I felt it deserved a decent grade. Unfortunately my teacher felt it did not. I received a 69 which is not enough to be a passing grade. I am so disappointed in myself. I hope I can do better in the future but I will have to work on not depending on my ex to be reliable. My mother has offered in the future if he is late to meet me and get the kids and let him come hunt her down for them. If he's here on time or at least tells me he will be late, that's different. Next time, it's all on him. I cannot stress myself this way. Anyway I shall endure the tears I now have because they are what will make me stronger. I will try harder on my next paper. I will not fail. I cannot fail.